Two pop culture addicts' snarky musings…

ATTENTION: Spoilers for all seasons of “Torchwood,” including “Children of Earth” and the fourth season below. Do not read if you have not watched the (available) seasons.

Dear England,

A pest of yours seems to have landed in L.A. Um, yeah, he’s beating the horse he killed a year ago and it’s frightening the children. But don’t worry, we’ll be returning him in a box filled with coffee from nine hysterical women.


The United States of America

I have had no interest whatsoever in the new season of “Torchwood” (set to air on Starz ) but have been unable to miss the news since I have so many groups and friends on LiveJournal invested in this new disaster.  After the deaths of Tosh and Owen in the second season, I was miffed but still had my favorite character, Ianto Jones, and pairing of Jack and Ianto to watch. And I decided I had been ignoring Gwen for so long I could keep doing it for the third season. And then “Torchwood: Children of Earth” dropped like the bomb it was. Or rather, the political drama RTD wrote and then decided to pop the remaining “Torchwood” characters in and call it a five-day event.

The death of Ianto Jones, the true heart and soul of Torchwood and I think I am right in saying, fan favorite, in Day Four was the death heard ‘round the fandom. This is not only because it was completely unexpected, but because it was done in a situation that, had the writers remembered a little thing called characterization, Jack and Ianto shouldn’t have gone into unprepared as they did. They are members of an organization created to protect the earth from extraterrestrial threats and they go into the chamber housing an alien known for its chemical warfare with no protective suits and only their guns as weapons? Even I would know not to do that.

This all to set it up so Jack could kill the grandson no one knew he had and complete destroy two seasons (and many “Doctor Who” crossover episodes) worth of character growth, therefore making it all moot. He ruined an amazing television show and his two best characters all in the name of “good drama.”

But what infuriates me the most is that Gwen Cooper, the supposed Heart of Torchwood who cheated on her fiancée, told him about the affair and then gave him an amnesia pill so he could forgive her and then forget she told him, made inappropriate advances to her boss her first day (though he wasn’t completely innocent) and only accepted her now husband’s proposal because her (unrequited) “true” love had left, has survived. She and her womb of steel survived explosions, gunfire, aliens secreting  poisonous gas and a massive amount of running all so she could go on and star in a new season of a show that should not bear the “Torchwood” name.

To give you an idea of how completely twisted and unrecognizable the show has become, let me introduce you to the new characters (courtesy of ONTD on LiveJournal though the Starz site only lists Rex as he is a series regular and the other two are reoccurring):

[REX MATHESON] CAUCASIAN, Late 20s, CIA agent, a fast-tracked high-flyer. And he knows it! Rex is fast, sharp, smart, clever, and when the situation demands it, ruthless. He’s got a lethal sense of humor – he doesn’t care if he makes enemies, he’s too busy enjoying himself. But when Rex’s life is put in danger, he feels his own mortality for the first time, and has to balance the demands of the job, and his duty to his country, against his desperate desire to survive. Though that doesn’t defeat him – if anything, it makes him even more arrogant and unstoppable than ever. For Rex, all rules are off! Like him or loathe him, you can’t miss him – and that’s exactly how Rex wants things to be.

[ESTHER KATUSI] She’s early 20s, a Watch Analyst at the CIA – it’s one of the less glamorous jobs, filtering information to pass along the chain. But Esther’s determined to better herself! She’s still young, so the job hasn’t made her cynical yet – she’s still an optimist, ever hopeful, and her faith in mankind is sustained by her own Christianity. She’s hopelessly in love with one of the CIA agents, Rex Matheson, though she’d never tell him. Nevertheless, she’s no pushover – she’s more than capable of thinking for herself, and can break the rules when she needs to. And when Esther’s forced off the grid, and on the run, she learns to survive, fast. She turns out to be a natural, learning to fight and run with the best of them, without ever losing her essential good-hearted nature.

[OSWALD JONES] CAUCASIAN, Late 40s, a convicted murderer and pedophile. But he’s no thug – this man is dangerously clever. Oswald escapes his sentence on a technicality, and finds himself becoming a media celebrity. And he’s sharp enough to make the most of the situation, and profit from it. He’s always thinking, always aware, always looking for the chance to promote himself – while living with the fact that many people want him dead. He appears to be wonderfully, genuinely repentant – but underneath, he’s still boiling with lust and rage. And one day, he’s going to lose control again. But this man is destined to become more important than even he could have foreseen, as terrifying events of worldwide significance begin to turn around him.

Yes you’re reading that right. One character, albeit only a recurring character but with the possibility of becoming a regular, is a murderer and a pedophile. But he’s smart and he’s repentant so we should just love him and ignore all that silly felony stuff.

I believe I speak for all when I say: what the hell? I literally cannot wrap my mind around this or even begin to understand the creators’ thought process on this entire monstrosity. It gives me a headache.

So I say keep flogging, Molly, but I am just one of many not tuning in to the mess you’ve decided to slap a Torchwood sticker on. Instead, I think I’ll take your excellent advice and go watch “Supernatural.”


Comments on: "‘Torchwood’ doesn’t look like itself anymore" (11)

  1. Amen. This could not have been said better.

  2. rogue time agent said:

    Are you my long lost twin? Well said and I totally agree with every word.

    Loved the letter at top.

  3. So very true.

  4. Austen said:

    Really; I loved Ianto and thought the Jack/Ianto relationship was a refreshing thing to see on TV but this scaremiongering is ridiculous.

    1) Where does it say that the Paedophile may become a regular?

    2) Where does it say that the Paedophile will be a good character? The impression I got is that he’s a dangeorus nasty sleazy man still manipulating the world for his own gain.

    3) He’s actually described as “unrepentent”. hence a clear signpost that he’s a V.I.L.L.A.I.N.

    4. Torchwood has featured a Paedophile before: Small Worlds, and that wasn’t the end of the show.

    5. Why isn’t Gwen Cooper Dead and Why is she flawed? Because people are flawed; and it seldom happens in life that the flawed get their comeuppance. Starz Press release describes Gwen as both selfless and selfish. I still think she’s fun to watch (increasingly so in later episodes) even if I don’t condone all her behaviour

    • 1. At the site where I originally got the information for the new characters, it listed if they would be regulars or not. Both Esther and Oswald were listed as reoccurring guest stars with the possibility of becoming regulars.

      2 & 3. I interpreted the last sentence in his description to mean something big is going to happen and he is going to prove he’s a good (or at least better) person during the event. He may be a nasty character at first, but I don’t know that he will stay that way given the description.

      4. Yes but that man was in just one episode, wasn’t the focus and didn’t return.

      5. I have never been a fan of Gwen, so obviously my view of her will be negative. To me there is nothing redeemable in her character.

  5. Sheree said:

    Totally agree. Rex sounds as if he’s a cross between Owen and Jack and Ester is a Tosh wannabe. And a pedophile named Jones is the ultimate insult to Ianto fans.

    I’m glad I took the suggestion about watching Supernatural to heart. Not only did I get “pretty boys” but I got better writing, better storylines, and better characterizations. With the added bonus of no Gwen.

  6. I read the description of Matheson, and thought, “fuck, it’s a male Gwen”. Seriously.
    And this Oswald Jones character makes me sick. I was prepared to give new TW a chance, but not now. Not with a character like that being given such prominence. I am too painfully aware of the soul-destroying effects of pedophilia on a child and I am beyond disgusted not only that RTD would think such a character is a good idea, but that it would be sanctioned by any network.

  7. Totally agree.


    “I read the description of Matheson, and thought, “fuck, it’s a male Gwen”.

    Yes! Even the way of introduction is the same! And “all rules are off” for him. Oh my – he is really another Gwen… Just what Gwenwood needed.

  8. wanda1969 said:

    Well said!
    The characters look horribly hackneyed from the arrogant Rex Matheson(for some reason the name reminds me of those 50s b movie stars- there was a parody of one once called Dash Riprock!)to the lovesick Esther.
    As for oswald JONES? Does everyone have to be called Jones?? Or is this supposed to be a message to those 9 hysterical women? I don’t live that far away from Wales, and I don’t know such a high proportion of people called Jones!

  9. ceindreadh said:

    [quote]Because people are flawed; and it seldom happens in life that the flawed get their comeuppance.[/quote]

    This isn’t life, this is a TV show.

    There’s nothing wrong with flawed characters on a TV show. What’s annoying is when the flaws are glossed over/ignored and the character is touted as being the heroine/heart and soul of the show. By all means give them flaws, but don’t expect us to ignore them just because TPTB do.

  10. Morgan said:

    Although Ianto was my favourite TW character (and I loved the Jack/Ianto pairing) I was still prepared to watch the new series after his death, until I read the synopsis; it just frustrated me, it was so disappointing.
    It seems that the writers are having Jack just completely forget Ianto… After all they’d been through together and after the promise Jack made that he would NEVER forget Ianto… It makes me feel a bit upset. Why the hell would Jack come back for GWEN? Because he LOVES her? Yeah, right. And Gwen loves Jack “a bit too much”? It’s not love, she’s just a bit of a whore… (for want of a better word)
    Rex and Esther. Well, clearly they’re the new Tosh and Owen… But lame. Tosh and Owen were great, but making new characters with the same (or very similar) personalities is stupid.
    As for Oswald JONES… The surname Jones isn’t THAT common. And I agree with everyone else on that one, what the hell? A paedophile as one of the regulars? Jesus, what was RTD on when he thought that one up?!

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